DON'T CO-SIGN THE 'CONTRACT OF WHEN'

Booking a family vacation when it’s school holidays seems logical if you value attendance and academics.

Toilet training when the weather’s warmer reduces the chances of cold inhibiting your child’s desire to de-clothe. I mean really, nobody likes a cold tushi, right?

Food-prepping on a Sunday when hubbies home or the children are out makes sense from a logistical point of view, agreed?

These are examples of a useful ‘whens’. Choices like these are intentional, thoughtful, reflective and moving you toward a goal; vacationing, toilet training and being organised. Check ✓

On the other side of useful ‘whens’ are what can be referred to as Excuse-Whens, also representing:

• Self-sabotage
• Procrastination
• Overwhelm
• Uncertainty
• Fear

They’re the ‘whens’ we use to justify, put off or hide-from. As a reforming overwhelm-induced-procrastinator, I know these when’s all to well! They might look like:

“When I earn more money, then I’ll join the gym”

“When things calm down at work, then I’ll catch up with the girls”

“When Johnny’s sleeping through the night, then I’ll focus on me again”

There’s an oversight in these rationales and it’s this:

Who’s to say how long you have to wait?

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not trying to depress you, but aren’t we being presumptuous to assume we’ve got time on our side? I’m all for living with hope and dreams, but a strategy that helps me do that is appreciating the fragility of life. Talk to a mother who’s lost a child or wife who’s buried a husband and time will take on a whole new meaning.

‘What’s the answer?’ I hear you ask. ‘Do we run out and check-off every Bucket List item today?’

Gee, if you’ve got the time, energy and finances to do that, I’m not going to stop you! Heck, I might even join you for one or two 😉

What I’m suggesting is the awareness, an offering to consider not co-signing the Contract Of When until you’ve given it some deep thought. As we grow up, mature (yes, apparently) and reflect on who we are, it’s nice to stop and wonder, ‘could I actually do that thing?’ The answer might be a yes that’s been hiding behind years of an unknown Contract Of When. A contract that no longer serves you.

As you go on with your day, pay attention to your 'whens' and suss out if they're serving you or instead, if they're the 'whens' that are sneakily holding you back from your goals. Then come back and tell me what you discovered! I love hearing your a-ha moments 🙌

Until then, stay amazing, savour and enjoy.

Catherine