MOTHERING THE NEWLY BORN THAT'S NOT THE BABY ... BUT YOU.

You may or may not know I co-own a humble preschool located on the Central Coast of NSW, Australia. One room. One yard. And a whole lot of love and connection among children, educators and families.

As I drove home today I had a thought about mothering I'd like to share with you. 

The world's full of millions of mums and millions of babies. Fortunately for us, this beautiful miracle continues day after day as women from every race, country, religion, stature and profession enter the role of 'mother'. 

Advice is offered, perhaps more than is requested. 

Books, social media pages, groups and the latest and best products are suddenly everywhere. The journey is one that can never be predicted, nor prepared for, so each woman ventures on through hard days and long nights. If you're one of the more fortunate there's lots of love, connection and pride immersed too.

My query is this.

The focus from well-meaning professionals, friends and loved ones offer advice and encouragement about caring for the baby and I trust in 2020, caring for self too. It's pleasing and oh so beneficial to be seeing the awareness and support of mental health for new mums. And there-in lies my thought. The New Mum. 

This new mum is like a child learning to feed, walk, talk or ride a bike. But there's an adult nearby to support and model as the child's neural pathways create new meanings and memories.

It's like a teenager learning to drive a car or master calculus. But there's a teacher nearby to talk them through the concepts and processes.

It's like an adult beginning a new job. But there's an induction and policies and procedures and colleagues and mentors to refer to.

The mum however is home alone, or at the park, or the shops, or work, or a family gathering, or a siblings sporting event and their brain is learning something new. CONSTANTLY. The mother's brain is trying something it's never had to do before. I'm certain you'll agree that every child is different, as is every new moment. Just when you think you've got it down pat, no, you're child has another idea!

Every day, the mother's brain is re-wiring, just like an infants. 

As I drove home and considered this thought, I felt compelled to reach out to you to say, 'Be patient with yourself. Your brain is newly born into roles and experiences it's not ever explored before EVERY. DAY. It's trying it's best. You're doing your best. End point.'